Just Another Lebanese Sunday

It's almost 10:30pm and I'm ending the day with an episode of 8 Limbed Boy on the Discovery Health Channel. The boy is from India and having his parasitic twin removed. It was odd enough for everyone else to call it a night and interesting enough to give me a second wind. Taking a two hour nap today may have helped as well. I'm sure to have some interesting dreams tonight, that's for sure.


Today was the first full day of my family being together for the holidays. I love my family, but sometimes I think the movies, especially holiday movies, have messed up my set of expectations for these times together. My time with them is immensely better when I can release these expectations and appreciate our time together as is.


Our day began with Lebanese Mass at 11am.


Actually it began with the drive over.


Sometimes I wonder if the reason my family always ends up having these crazy tense arguments on the way to church is so that we arrive to Mass with a clear sense of our need for forgiveness. Never fails. My dad only managed to score one middle finger from a fellow driver on the drive down. Not bad. My brother, stewing in the fact that he didn't have enough time to get ready because he thought Mass was at noon and not 11am, would not turn and look at the beautiful rainbow behind us. He missed a good one.


My mom, trying to mediate, cracked us all up. "Are you joking me? I told you 11am yesterday."


Though the funniest thing she did today was after church, at lunch with some family friends (they are a Lebanese and El Salvadoran couple), when in hopes of asking for a spoon, she asked the waitress in Spanish. Here's the funny thing. My mom's English is not that great, her Spanish is even worse. Oh, and, the waitress was from the Phillipines. "One Asian asking another Asian for a spoon in Spanish, I think it's ok to use English here." was my brother's commentary. He's agreed that he's the snarky one in the family. I'm a close second.


With only a two hour break in between gatherings, I passed out. First nap of the holidays. Then it was off to my uncle and aunt's home for a visit around 6pm. He's the uncle who had emergency brain surgery while we were all on vacation in San Diego, for my cousins wedding. Whenever I see him, I am reminded of God's ability to do the impossible!


And, in good Lebanese fashion, we left my aunt and uncles home for a 'short' visit with another family. Elie and Eva are good family friends. They were high school sweethearts and fell in love 30 years later, when my uncle (that's what we call family friends) was divorced and Eva was widowed.


It's a very Lebanese thing to travel from home to home simply visiting people. This is especially true if someone is in town visiting. I'm also always in awe watching Lebanese families host their guests. They rarely ask, what would you like to drink, they just serve you their best. To the Lebanese, it's how you honor each other, both in offering coffee, tea, and homemade baklava and figs, as well as receiving them gladly. So my dad having my brother AND me home is like opening gifts on Christmas for him. Joy.

When I was a kid we would stop and visit Lebanese families and friends, often on the way home. My dad would say we'll just stay long enough for one cup of coffee. That coffee would often take an hour and a half to finish. What was deceiving was that Arabic coffee is a lot like espresso, meant to be sipped. The size is only about 1/4 of a cup. No milk. But, man oh man, did they nurse that coffee.


Overall, today was a great day of being with my family, experiencing Advent, and getting in touch with my Lebanese roots, one piece of baklava at a time.


And oh, here's what happened to the 8 Limbed Boy, in case you were writhing in agony, wondering if he made it. Good news, the surgery was completely successful and he's recovering.


Well, The Boy Who Shed Tears of Blood just came on, and that's my cue to go to bed!

Today...

...Fresno welcomed winter unofficially with fast falling leaves, brisk cool air, and morning after rain smell. 

...I woke up refreshed after a great 8 hours of sleep. 

...I got my eyebrows threaded. (I've got an eyebrow reputation to keep up ;)

...I sighed, but wasn't surprised when I called my dad and brother to find out what they wanted for dinner this week. I was at Trader Joes, they were on their way. His reply, "We don't need dinner, but, oh, that reminds me, can you find us a hotel?" That would be 3 hours before they arrive. I feel the need to mention that they just booked their rental car yesterday. Time to time I get razzed for being indecisive, last minute, and late... my response, "I never had a fighting chance" 

...I got to host friends over for a late lunch. It was good conversation over pita chips with an olive tapenade and a pomegranate, goat cheese and arugala salad. I felt very refined. 

...I got to hold my friend's aborable new baby, Samuel, who not only fell asleep in my arms but kept smiling in his sleep. 

...my little brother and dad arrived in Fresno (for the first time ever) and I enjoyed giving them a taste of of the town. My dad was surprised how Fresno was much bigger than he thought. "You have a 99 cent store?! Oh, really?" Yes, he actually said this. My brother said Fresno felt like the midwest. I see what he means. It definitely doesn't feel like Vegas.

...my roommates and I exchanged gifts since we'll be spending Christmas with our families. I found myself thankful for such great friends. 

...saw Nayla, a family friend, for the first time in 10 years. She's around my age, Lebanese, and lives here. Can't wait to have dinner with her this week. 

...I watched LXD (Legion of Extraordinary Dancers) on hulu with my roommates. We hooked up the projector and it was great. It was the season finale and it seriously was one big breakdance fight!

...I'm going to bed as soon as I can so I'm rested for tomorrow's day trip to Sequoia with my dad and brother. I expect this time together to generate many blogworthy topics for days to come. 

Trees and things

Growing up we had glorious Christmas trees. My parent's home had vaulted ceilings, so our trees would be 8', 9', and 10' tall! We were all about the ornaments too. One year my mom, brother and I hand made Christmas ornaments with each of my cousins names on them. Did I mention I have 41 cousins?! One per cousin. Plus aunts and uncles. It was a really full tree that year.

Also, Lebanese people really know how to take the Nativity scene to a whole new level. Not just a simple set of ceramic statues here. I'm talking crinkled newspaper as faux mountain terrain, mirrors with sprayed snow for the ice skating rink effect, and patches of trimmed wheat germ and sprouts for the grassy knolls. When Christmas rolled around, our living room was transformed into a winter wonderland.

So, the year my parents divorced, my brother and I were pretty devastated that we weren't getting a tree. So much so, that my dad actually caved in and purchased one of those living trees. It was literally 2 feet tall and still in the pot. We cried even harder. Looking back, I realize it was probably more than just the tree, but as a 3rd grader and 7th grader, respectively, my brother and I could only articulate our sadness about the tree. We did our best to love that tree, decorating it was some lights and ornaments. My dad even put it on a chair and covered the chair with a blanket to give it some height. 

Well, after Christmas passed, my dad planted that tree in our front yard. During those 4 years that my parents were divorced, that tree watched lots of life happen at our home while it grew. Those were crazy years, as my brother and I were living in between three homes at the same time, this one, my mom's, and my aunts. In some ways, that tree was the most constant thing at our home those years. 

Then a miracle happened. My parents reconnected. They began talking again. They spent more and more time together. They fell back in love and remarried each other, putting an end to their 4 year separation. My mom moved back in. My brother and I eventually graduated from high school and then college. Later my parents ended up moving into a new home. My aunt and uncle bought that house from them. They still live there today.

All the while, the tree kept growing.

Today, as I was working on Christmas Cards and verifying addresses and zip codes, I looked up my old home on Google Maps. And there I saw that itty bitty tree was all grown up. It's unbelievable to see how full, healthy and humungous it is! Looking at it now, you would never have believed it's humble beginnings.

I remember one year, when the tree had grown to about 6 or 7 feet, we considered chopping it down and using it as our Christmas tree that year. My parents had gotten back together and we thought it could be a cool symbol of our family being together again. I can't remember why we never did. But I'm really glad we didn't. 

I know that seeing that baby tree, I had enough faith to imagine it would one day grow up to be an average sized Christmas tree. It would just take time. But I don't know that I would have ever imagined that runt of a thing would one day be taller than my house! Much taller.

When I see that tree now, I see a symbol of fortitude.

When I see that tree now, I am reminded of the power of forgiveness.

And when I see that tree now, I laugh a little at the fact that I can still go to my childhood home, anytime, and see my little tree, because it's still in the family.